Johnny just loves it when people outwit crooks by doing the simplest things

Long long ago when dinosaurs roamed the earth and Johnny was in college, like so many students putting themselves through school he had a part time job. It was at what in Michigan they call a party store, here a bodega. Think along the lines of a 7-11 or Mi-T-Mart from Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Johnny often worked the midnight shift when the more colorful customers would drop by.

One evening a fellow looking really no different than most went to the back cooler and grabbed a 12-pack of beer in each hand but not before lowering his ball cap. This piqued Johnny's curiosity. Long story short, yes, he acted like he was going to set the beer on the counter but turned and ran out as fast as he could. One gentleman entering the store noticed and yelled at the thief to stop and chased a few feet but for whatever reason thought better and came back to the store. He gave a statement to Ypsilanti PD but Johnny's statement was one of those simplest of things stopping stupid crooks. The police asked what kind of clues they could gather and Johnny simply said the guy's name is "XXXXX XXXXXXX" and he graduated from XXXX high school in 19XX;

The thief had worn his high school varsity jacket to steal the beer. Once he pulled his ball cap down Johnny made note of his last name. When he walked to the front he got his first name above his graduation year next to the varsity letter with his school's name on it. 20 minutes later the cops pulled up with the same guy in the back of their car and asked is he the one? Yes he is. Bye boy bye.

In Journal Square a robber entered the 7-11 there and demanded money. A harrowing moment perhaps. Unless the clerk simply stepped backwards two steps into an office and locked themselves inside.

The loser robber left empty-handed.