If you're kicked out of an NFL game peeps, get ready to go back to school

The NFL has decided that drunken louts, or maybe just regular louts need some schoolin'. Should a patron get kicked out of the New Meadlowlands (again, we're not getting paid to promote a corporate entity), or the Patriots home digs you'll need to attend a class and pass a test to be allowed the "privilege" of seeing NFL football live.

Look, we're all seen people who make us uncomfortable at sporting events. We've seen it again and again and again.

Is a class really going to make someone behave better?

But Johnny, the NFL says if you don't take the class you can't go to another game. Yeah, right, pull this one, it plays jingle bells. If you want tickets to a game yet you can't access your regular season tickets because the privilege of paying The Ballclub a personal seat license has been revoked there are a myriad of ways to get them, no class needed (hey a little joke there).

Again, the NFL uses fairy dust on a real problem and then tells everyone they are out ahead of said problem. No, they are not. Johnny quit going to NFL games at the end of 2008 after years of enduring years of loutish and drunken stupidity (In Detroit and Cleveland) which became so bad one afternoon in Cleveland Browns Stadium he physically had to punch out drunken toads who became violent after using racial slurs after pouring beer on Johnny, his wife and an African-American couple next to them. Getting to the point where you must physically protect yourself and your wife was the last straw. Think those group of guys who pulled that are having any trouble seeing Browns games?

It ain't worth it, class or not. The NFL has a horrible problem they refuse to address, booze inside the stadium after hours spent drinking outside. When you want to discuss THAT NFL then Johnny may consider going back to an NFL game. The inmates run the asylum at these events and threatening a fanbase with a bad behavior class will change nothing. It only gives the NFL a fallback.

Kids love this one...

From behind Conor O'Neill's in Ann Arbor Michigan on St. Patrick's Day 2007. Around 1 pm in the afternoon these two revelers gave true meaning to handicapped parking spot.

Santa Con and Hoboken bar crawl all in one today?

Oh we think it's a fabulous idea. Johnny will be grabbing the PATH to Hoboken later to hopefully get video of when drunken Santas attack. A Santa bar crawl in Hoboken? Gentlemen and Gentlewomen, get your cameras.

Our friends in Hoboken seem to have the drunken brawl perfected

And St. Patrick's Day is months off. Two, count 'em two large sized alcohol fueled brawls have taken place over the last week. One on Saturday had about 125 people rubbernecking or engaging in fisticuffs while another, yesterday involving what Hoboken police said was a 50 person brawl took a while to get under control.

The Michigan state motto is "If you seek a pleasant peninsula look about you." Soon we'll have to change Hoboken's city motto to "If you're looking for a large barfight, you've come to the right place."

Hoboken is going to try some radical thinking after last year's St. Patrick's Day debacle

Hoboken last year became the national poster child for too much green beer as many of you will recall. Johnny certainly got a lot of copy ink out of it. Now, in order to curtail the out of hand drunken mouth breathers (And good people of Hoboken we are not calling you mouthbreathers, just the drunken louts who ruin it for everyone. We have a mouthbreather of a mayor here in Jersey City, so we're even) the Mile Square City is going allow......... the bars to open four hours earlier.

We'll repeat that. The City of Hoboken will allow bars to open at 9 am instead of 1 pm last year. Johnny is loading up the Jersey City Desk Action News Truckasaurus on March 17th and we are gonna bring you every angle of the hot mess in Hoboken.

As a website that lives to comment on bad ideas, we endorse this plan with all our being.

If people are peeing from rooftops and falling down drunk, it MUST be a St. Patrick's party in Hoboken

Hooo weeee man, they sure know how to have a good time up the street. According to a Jersey Journal story, things got a little nutty in the Big H this past weekend. People peeing off of rooftops, people performing sex acts in front of a window as the parade went by, teenagers falling down drunk in the streets and the usual spate of alcohol related mischief; police gave out 376 summonses this year: 220 for holding an open alcohol container in public, 52 for public urination, 33 for public consumption of alcohol, 32 for disorderly conduct or disturbing the peace, 26 for overly rowdy house parties, one for littering, 12 for other assorted violations, AND A PARTRIDGE IN A PEAR TREE, oops, wait, wrong holiday.

Hoboken Public Safety Director Bill Bergin says he wants to cancel the event. The Jersey City Desk couldn't disagree more. We need material to write about on a quiet Monday night. Readership improves when you have tags that say public drunkenness, public sex acts, and peeing from rooftops. God bless the Googlers. Bergin says he thinks even if the National Guard tried to keep the peace they'd have just as many problems. Mr. Bergen, they wear green, so invite them. The Guardsmen have been known to knock back a few cold ones.

Now Hoboken is doing everything in their power to ruin the fun by passing out willy nilly $BIG MONEY open container tickets, and really, how silly. How many other days do 20,000 people head to Hoboken for God's sake? The city handed out scads of those open container $BIG MONEY tickets. Now do you see why poor poor Mr. Bergin will never get his wish? It's a cash cow for Hoboken. Poo-pooing the party guests while grabbing penalty cash with both hands makes for faux outrage.

Come on down to old Hoboken Town, we've got St. Patty's fun for the whole family (language warning)

This is how kids lose front teefus while drinking. Now keg stands are nothing new, but normally said keg should have some brew in it.