Saturday, February 28, 2015

Kind of an odd way to advertise if you ask us

This morning the sound of staple guns rang out in PADNA as workers from Lloyd Goldman's POS (Yes, piece of shit, so named by a gal Johnny was walking behind one day who made that very observation) Building at 111 First St. Now Johnny couldn't make out everything on the sign but did speculate on Twitter it says: "Move to this POS Building, become a pariah."

So what do you think Jersey City? What do you think a sign for a classless piece of shit like Lloyd Goldman who lied his way into Jersey City and then gave low income residents the back of his hand would say to rent this dump? Here are a few Johnny would suggest:

*Car insurance paid up? Tough neighborhood.
*Sure the accommodations are sparse, and it's a tall box.
*Construction around this building will go on for ten more years.
*Come live where people used to let their dogs poop.
*BJ's and ShopRite are close, too bad they're closing.

What do YOU think Jersey City? Think you could help Lloyd put some lipstick on this pig he built? Give us your slogans in comments and don't hold back.

Late night open thread

As Johnny said earlier on Twitter, tonight he had an absolutely fabulous Bibimbap at Kraverie. Reminded him of sitting back at the counter at Steve's Lunch in Ann Arbor eating a bowl of that for lunch many weekdays back when the world was in black and white. Good food sure makes life worthwhile sometimes.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark


Tonight's Music Series is brought to you by the letter 'C', the third letter in the alphabet but first in your heart, for tonight anyway. This band here, The Climax Blues Band was originally formed as The Climax Chicago Blues Band -- in England in 1968. Work THAT into a conversation tomorrow.
'Couldn't Get it Right' is so 70's you'll want to wear GASS shoes again.


You know what you need on C night? Some romance in your life and right now the Corvells are going to deliver it right to your ears. A fabulous rare doo-wop tune from we're guessing 1961ish, 'Daisy'.


We sure hope you've had as much fun with the letter C tonight as we've had bringing it to you. We're out the door after The Church and 'Under the Milky Way'

Friday, February 27, 2015

Normally we don't do this kind of thing but it's Friday so OK

Johnny will throw out one of questions from last night's Big Bang Theory from some kind of relationship quiz. "If you could invite anyone in the world to dinner who would it be?" It does kind of suppose the person is living so no historical figures.

Share your answer with us in comments. We'd love to hear who you think the best dinner date would be.

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Late night open thread

It's an untapped market.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

A simply MAGNIFICENT take down of Governor Gone from the Gray Lady this morning

The New York Times has a fantastic look back though all of Chris Christie's failures, both inept and planned stupidity and exactly why his political career at this point is over. Even if you're a Christie supporter it's going to be pretty hard to argue with facts.

Late night open thread

Probably the happiest period in life most frequently is in middle age, when the eager passions of youth are cooled, and the infirmities of age not yet begun; as we see that the shadows, which are at morning and evening so large, almost entirely disappear at midday.
 -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

More pie in the sky from the Mayor last night

Mayor Steve Fulop gave his 'State of the City' address last night and as usual, he had a lot of praise for himself. A video ran before the speech of former President Clinton giving Fulop accolades. Kinda tells you what comes next. Fulop touted what he called "the greatest growth and expansion ever seen in Jersey City's history."

OK Mr. Mayor, so why is the budget so flat? When are we getting rebates or lower property taxes? This building boom should have our city coffers in much better shape, there should have been talk last night about Jersey City residents getting something back. You sure missed on that one. Do you think people don't notice all the construction and loss of parking around town? We're not blind Mr. Mayor and frankly your promises on city finances are coming up short. You might also want to point out that most of what you see going up now you're taking credit for Mr. Mayor was signed off on and started under former Mayor Healy. Somehow you missed telling us that.

Fulop also made a big deal last night about, since every empty lot is either under construction or is in the planning stages, he was back in his effusive praise of affordable housing downtown. His words have never rung so hollow. Remember when Fulop was Ward E councilman? Remember the community arts building that once stood, in Fulop's ward that Lloyd Goldman had dragged down to build a new 38 story high rise WITH of course 10% set aside for art space and affordable housing? Well as soon as this proposal got the green light Goldman, as he no doubt planned to do all along, then reneged on his affordable apartments and art space. Fuck that Goldman said, he didn't want the poors living there despite what he signed off on to get tax breaks he was never made to pay back. So, that did Councilman or Mayor Fulop say about this deal? Absolutely fucking nothing on record. Thanks Mayor for your support and undying work on affordable housing in Jersey City. If your next work is anything like your previous work on getting residents downtown into affordable units just admit your speech last night was just that, a pie in the sky speech.

So the Mayor gave a speech and practically nobody outside his inner circle were impressed by it. In fact, we're going to give the Jersey City Desk famous last word to Ward D council member Michael Yun:

"He painted a pretty picture, but we're looking for more substance."

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Late night open thread

I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there.
 -- Unknown

Time for Jersey CIty, After Dark

The Port Authority has their head up their collective asses again today

So your guess is as good as ours when the Newark to WTC line will stop having signal problems. NJ Transit at last word had stopped cross honoring tickets. Johnny thinks signal problems is a catch all for not investing enough of our money back into the system. They just had over a year of weekends to look at signals and tracks and catch up on work. It's become quite clear they ate Cocoa Puffs and ran around underground without achieving much, if any of their so-called Sandy repairs.

But they had Cocoa Puffs.

Late night open thread

On this day in 1938, MGM announced that they had purchased the book rights and would be making a movie version of The Wizard of Oz. They also announced that 16 year-old Judy Garland would be playing Dorothy Gale.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Monday, February 23, 2015

Wildlife sighting in downtown Jersey City!

While walking the dire wolf this morning, and after grabbing a coffee at the Warehouse Cafe as he is known to stop in and buy at the halfway point in the walk, Johnny's wolf began really barking. Now she's a talker anyway but this, this was different. She seemed somehow fixated on a line of cars outside the building the Warehouse Cafe is in. Bark bark whiiiiiiine bark. What ever could it be?

A skunk! A big old skunk crawling under cars making his or her way east down Bay St. Johnny stood in the street trying to get pictures with a wilding dog trying also not to get sprayed. Finally the skunk acquiesced. Johnny then warned residents coming out of the building there. He warned Warehouse customers. He did NOT warn the  Lloyd Goldman 111 First. St. construction guys because screw them.

A skunk, no doubt out for a morning stroll, perhaps to the Warehouse Cafe because they use that great Intelligentsia Coffee Johnny loves so much. Maybe the skunk was headed to the food truck down at the corner of Bay and Warren, how apropos. Here's your shots of the wildlife going on downtown even as we speak Jersey City.

Sunday, February 22, 2015

Late night open thread

I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.
 -- Jack Benny

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

It's Hockey Day in America!

From banner-barren San Jose to Boston, from Newark to hockey's newest-home-to-be in Las Vegas. From the cathedral that is Joe Louis Arena in Detroit all the way to the wasteland that is hockey in Miami and the Panthers.

We love the game, some of us live the game, and we around these parts all pull hard for the USA.

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Late night open thread

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

We sure hope you're enjoying all this awesomely timed snow!

Johnny sure saw a lot of people out looking happy this afternoon as the snow really got going. Kids and dogs looked especially happy. Here are a couple animations Johnny created around Jersey City today.

Like the slogan says, Jersey City, Make it Yours!

Johnny proclaims today to be a Jersey City Snow Day!

As temperatures rise this afternoon the snow is going to begin to fall. Since the temps ARE coming up Johnny invites everyone in Jersey City to get outside tonight and enjoy our fair city. Walk around, have fun, have a snowball fight. Go to dinner and hold hands with with the one you love. Walk your dog (or cat) and take pictures. The important thing is to just have some fun with winter in Jersey City!

Friday, February 20, 2015

Late night open thread

3-5" of fresh snow coming on Saturday afternoon into Saturday evening. Is there any better time to get snow? Johnny knows his See Spot Rescued pup will be over the moon excited.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark


It's Friday night and we know you kids wanna get your groove thing on and get out to your disco clubs and so forth so we'll kick things off with Diana Ross and the LONG (free with a fill-up) version of 'Love Hangover' while you get ready. Happy Ubering!


Let's see how many razor-thin connections we can make between events and songs tonight shall we? It's Hockey Weekend in America this weekend and Johnny's all for that. To that end, here's Violent Femmes with 'American Music' so we can enjoy a song about America without guns or hymns or things marching on.



We here at the Jersey City Desk would like to wish every one a Happy Chinese New Year, the year of the sheep. If only there was a song or something to celebrate such an occasion. Oh wait, heh heh, here comes a very poorly set-up joke. Smoke 'em if ya got 'em and since it's from the Animals album by the time the song is over it'll be time for next year's animal.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Late night open thread

Yep, 15-20º below zero with wind chill tonight. Having fun yet?

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Since it's freezing outside maybe you can assist police with a cold case

Johnny is one who loves a cold case file. Let's walk that back, he enjoys working on cold cases but does realize someone sadly had to die for this to become a case at all. Johnny just has a knack for such things and yes has contributed research and information on other cases to police. Just something he's good at.

Now here's a case on a freezing cold day you might just want to pull up a chair and read on. A case ten years on in the disappearance of Danielle Imbo from Mt. Laurel and Richard Petrone, Jr. from Philadelphia. Read the article and then try reading up on other write-ups and if you have questions as you go make a god strong mental note or write your questions down. Research your questions and see if they can be answered. If not, move them into the intriguing pile. For heaven's sake if you do know something or figure something out about it, please DO contact police or how will you ever know if your work was right?

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Late night open thread

The United Center and the Blackhawks thank you for coming tonight. Big Chief EmptySeats and the Illinois State Police remind you do designate a driver and get home safely. Safety, like losses to the Red Wings, is no accident.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Round One in Mayor Steve Fulop's lawsuit against the Port Authority goes to...

...Mayor Fulop and Jersey City. You'll recall Fulop sued the Port Authority (which will get anyone in good graces with Johnny) on the grounds they owe our fair city over $400 million in unpaid taxes. The PA tried to get the cases dismissed by spending thousands and thousands of your tax dollars and bridge fees on attorneys fees and lost...this round.

Going after a giant monolith with a Smaug-like pile of lawyering cash is never easy and always takes a long time. Now that the lawsuit it would seem has merit no doubt the Port Authority will now want a 10% increase to cover, uh, incidentals like more lawyers.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Late night open thread

We still have a few minutes of Fat Tuesday left, how about another one from the Balfa Brothers before bed. The classic 'Jolie Blon'

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Our friend Smarty Jones at the Mile Square View in Hoboken just broke a HUGE exclusive

WOW, here's some gumshoe work, Smarty Jones has uncovered some wrongdoing in Hoboken involving some emails stolen from Mayor Dawn Zimmer. Your link is here, get going!

That horse has a nose in front!

With apologies, getting a late start on Mardi Gras today!

Fat Tuesday is here so let's hear some Balfa Brothers and 'La Danse de Mardi Gras'

Governor Gone delays all state offices opening until 11am today

From New Hampshire, where he has been elected after running for and not winning the Iowa governor's seat, Chris Christie has declared that state offices will delay opening because of this powdery easy to drive on snow.

Just wanted to give you aheads up Jersey City, like if you were going to get your drivers license renewed or what not. Not 'til 11.

Monday, February 16, 2015

Late night open thread

Yes, despite telling himself he did not have the flu Johnny indeed has a stomach bug, a real nasty one. Hopefully we'll be back with you tomorrow, good citizens.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Saturday, February 14, 2015

Laye night open thread

Twilight drops her curtain down, and pins it with a star.
 -- Lucy Maud Montgomery

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

This coming winter storm is neither funny nor cute

The Jersey City Desk is suspending the usual fun we have with storms and snow events to remind you, the temperatures coming after midnight tonight through Monday afternoon are DANGEROUS. Check on neighbors you feel are at risk. Bring animals inside. We're talking -20º to -30º wind chills for extended periods. If you see someone outside who may be having difficulty at least call someone to help them. This one storm it's OK to err on the side of caution when it comes to calling 911.

Late night open thread

Well they upped the amount of snow by tomorrow night to 3-5"which Johnny was reading will make the supreme cold air we're going to get even colder as the snow draws moisture from the air making it drier and colder. So when it's 30 below with wind chill Sunday and Monday morning you think how pretty that snow looked coming down Saturday afternoon.

Stupid snow.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark


What better band to use to make a point about freedom of music availability. Now Johnny's not saying music should be free. Follow him for a second on this one. Sunday night Saturday Night Live is holding a huge 40th anniversary show with the best clips from 40 years and stars and of course MUSIC. Every Saturday Night Live has had a musical guest. Everybody who is somebody has played SNL. So, go on YouTube and watch some of those amazing clips of all that iconic music. Go ahead. No, just keep trying. Maybe it's just that song. Try again, search by bands you know that have been on SNL. No? Nothing?

There's part of the problem isn't it? Johnny was gonna make tonight's Music Series all about the great music we're all grown up with on SNL and he can barely bring any of it to you. It's just not right. Wait Johnny, did you say barely? Yes fans, from a live television program that airs at night once a week but sometimes more, here's The Clash and their haunting classic 'Straight to Hell' to kick off the Music Series in a pissed off sort of way.


Sherman, set the Way Back Machine to 1987 and move the furniture to the outside of the room. Good. Now, everybody grab a partner. Now drop that diamond needle on the record and away we go. k.d. lang & the Reclines with 'Turn Me Round'

The next dance will be a circle square.


Listening to Pete Townshend and The Who makes Johnny wanna drink Remy Martin cognac and fight. A great combination since Pete and The Who were Johnny's soundtrack and worldview for a young life. A bologna sandwich, an apple and a thermos of cognac and some Who cassettes. That was lunch. And Johnny was happy to have it. Not so happy he wouldn't not take the great advice in this classic song, 'Slip Kid' and not repeating the mistakes of your elders in a lot of things you look up to them for. Got-dam Pete rips it up on this one.

A hot song on a c-c-c-cold night.

Friday, February 13, 2015

Would you like to meet the best Valentine ever tomorrow?

Because Johnny guarantees if you go to the mixer tomorrow from 1-3 at 9 Erie, home of Very-Clothes and Goods, and you show up with love in your heart you can GO HOME with a new love interest who will never cheat on you, a warm puppy!! That's right friends, See Spot Rescued is having an adoption event tomorrow at the aforementioned time at the aforementioned place.

Bruce Springsteen will the there!

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Late night open thread

I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.
 -- Mitch Hedberg

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Jennifer Morrill, Unplugged!

That's right Jersey City, an AMAZING record offer, the BEST of Jersey City mayoral spokesperson Jennifer Morrill now exclusively on SpacePunk Records and Tapes. You'll get such timeless hits as:

*Steve Fulop doesn't know what he's talking about

*Councilman Fulop should get the whole story before he runs his mouth

*Those are false narratives put out by enemies of Mayor Healy

Former Mayor Healy left this city in debt

Former Mayor Healy should stop his failed criticisms of Mayor Fulop

You''ll need a freedom of information request filed with the city

And of course you'll get her newest hit: Steve Hyman is delusional and not only losing all his money, but clearly also losing his mind

*denotes a recording on the old Healy Records label

So there you go Jersey City, follow this handy link to see more, so much more on this amazing record offer.
"Hey man, can I borrow your copy of The Best of Jennifer Morrill?"
"Oh no my brother, you got to get your own..."

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Late night open thread

Wooooooo Wooooooo all aboard the World Wide Web!

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

We're glad to see citizens standing up for Councilman Daniel Rivera

We're going to talk about fine lines today class.

Recently, a flier or fliers were posted around town claiming City Council member Daniel Rivera said, and we're quoting a gutless flier only for context: "too many black kids got jobs" in the city's recreation department, a claim Rivera has denied.

OK, fine lines. We don't know Daniel Rivera personally. We do know he's a committed to Jersey City kind of guy. He donated his time to coach baseball teams, he held fundraisers for sick kids. He's a city council member. So, when you're going to make such a frightening claim in quotes YOU BETTER DAMNED WELL PUT YOUR NAME TO IT. Johnny goes after the disgusting acts of the builders and developers and shows you when they pee in pubic, drink in public but NEVER EVER NEVER would Johnny invent a quote from say Toll Brothers saying "Yep, we pee in your neighborhood and really don't care." You simply cannot invent quotes. If you are saying he said something back up your words...


Monday, February 9, 2015

Late night open thread

Johnny hates people who use big words just to make themselves look perspicacious.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Jersey City is a lousy place to spend Valentine's Day...

...or so says something calling itself The site ranked Jersey City #89 of the top 100 most populous cities (Newark was even worse at #92) or worst places to spend Valentine's Day.

So, why does Jersey CIty rank so poorly? According to the website "such metrics as restaurant meal costs and the number of attractions and florists per capita." Um, Jersey City food is hotter than a firecracker right now so strike one WalletHub. Florists? Really? Who goes into a neighborhood florist in most places? You get online or pick up a phone and order flowers. Johnny had two dozen long stem red roses delivered for Michigan State's triumphant Rose Bowl win over Stanford a little over a year ago. Hudson Florists. Just call. Strike two WalletHub. Which brings us to number of attractions. You're telling us WalletHub that out of 100 populated cities Jersey City is only ahead of EIGHT on attractions? Here's a great Jersey City attraction and it's FREE:

There you go, J. Owen Grundy Park. It's free for your Valentine's stroll and Johnny defies you to seek a better backdrop.

Strike three WalletHub, bite us.

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Late night open thread

Here's Johnny's best guess at what the sidewalks and roadways are gonna look like when you get up to go to work tomorrow:

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Just spitballing an idea here

This new 95 story building planned to break ground this spring on Hudson St. had damn well better have an observation deck. How many places can you actually go and take photos looking OVER the Manhattan skyline?

Exactly. Johnny's an idea man.

Saturday, February 7, 2015

Late night open thread

Ah, summer...

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

This supposed snow storm tomorrow night, yeah you can skip that

After miss after miss on huge snow amounts we've been supposed to get this winter, and seing as how tomorrow night's storm started at 4-8", then 3-6", then 1-3" until now it's someone throwing confetti and sleet...maybe.

Bottom line, we think you'll live to see Monday.

Late night open thread

A drunk is in front of a judge. The judge says, 'You've been brought here for drinking.' The drunk says, 'Okay, let's get started.'

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Friday, February 6, 2015


Dim the lights, pour yourself a couple fingers of bourbon and kick back. Listen, just listen to the fabulous Etta James and her classic, 'Ball and Chain' getting things off to a smoky bluesy start tonight.

After the song you can tell us all your problems in the comments section.


Generals and majors, like never before, are tired of being actionless...

As it was in 1980 so it still is in 2015. XTC and 'Generals and Majors'


Night time? It's the right time. Now, be on your merry way Jersey City, and party like you mean it.

Looks like Johnny's scolding about vaccines needs to be stronger -- OK

Johnny had to let one of his interns go. They talked all kinds of bullshit in their spare time about vaccines hidden dangers, about things he'd read online by 'activists' in the cause. Johnny asked the intern at any point if they had ANY kind of medical science backing them. Johnny was told of course not but the government is bad anyway. They have kids they refuse to vaccinate. On and on and on this went. For the last few months Johnny has wondered what kind of illness incubator the intern ran around their home. Now today we hear from the local CBS teevee station about an infant in Jersey City that has contracted measles after being exposed by somebody who was obviously unvaccinated. The intern blamed Obama and the government vaccines. Johnny just told the intern their internship was up.

Johnny does not want, and will not have his health or that of his family put at risk and those he comes in contact with because people against vaccines are simply, wait for it, TOO STUPID to try and even understand the truth. He'll put it another way, if you don't want your kids vaccinated over some fake autism scare, don't even come to this website. You're uninvited. Johnny doesn't want you here either. Get lost.

Here in America vaccines are SAFE and they are to be taken. END OF DISCUSSION.

Thursday, February 5, 2015

Late night open thread

We're got a partial NHL score from Denver tonight. Late in the second period it's Detroit 1.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

So Devils fans, what trades would you make?

As the NHL gets within the last month before the trading deadline teams assess their chances and needs. In some cases top teams need a piece to put them over the top though usually a trade at the deadline is not the end all be all. As an old hockey adage goes, sometimes the best trades are the ones you don't make. Well Devils fans what changes would you make? Is anyone untouchable? Zidlicky to Detroit? Jagr back to Pittsburgh? Since it's apparent the Devils need an influx of big draft picks and young talent if YOU were GM, what would you do?

Late night open thread

Watching Pulp Fiction on IFC before bed tonight because it's nothing if not a calming movie. Suddenly the urge for a $5 milkshake is strong. And a Big Kahuna burger. And a vanilla Coke. And blueberry pancakes.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Quick question for the sciency types

Because a quick question is all Johnny has time for today. How the fuck to bugs get inside lightbulbs? Not the outer housing or protective cover but IN the lightbulb.

We'll hang up and listen to your answer.

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Late night open thread

No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn.
 -- Hal Borland

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

A Jersey City Desk Editorial

Vaccines, GET THEM. There are zero excuses that hold any water.

This has been a Jersey City Desk Editorial.

Monday, February 2, 2015

Late night open thread

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Jersey City's own weather prognosticator, Jebediah the Wombat, did NOT see his shadow

So this late-arriving winter can hurry the hell up and leave.

Johnny ventured over to where Jebediah the Jersey City Wombat lives (under one of those hundreds of bricks near the corner of Bay Street and Warren near the Powerhouse Arts Building) and as Jebediah came out from under his brick home Johnny asked him since he DID NOT see his shadow how much longer winter would last.

"You're the people, you figure it out." he said and then trudged back under the bricks.

Sunday, February 1, 2015

Late night open thread

Here we see Seahawks coach Pete Carroll discuss to the assembled Super Bowl media his decision to pass the ball on the Patriots one yard line with Marshawn Lynch in his backfield:

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

It's the Super Bowl XVLLMCLMMXVIICLMXVI open thread!!

Here you go football fans and here you go fans of the commercials, an all day, all night open thread to make comment on anything you see fit. Get here early, the pre-game starts at noon for a 6:30pm football game so there'll be plenty to talk about.

OK ad fans, Johnny's got an early peek at a Super Bowl ad. You'll see it tonight but now you'll see it here hours before.

Johnny is suspending his no advertising rule on this one because it's so goddamn funny.

So plan on spending some of your beer and nacho cheese filled day with the Jersey City Desk staff.

Oh, yes, the Fearless Forecast:

Seattle 27
New England 23

Late night open thread

Time for Jersey City, After Dark