Sunday, March 31, 2013

Late night open thread

On this day in 1889 the Eiffel Tower was dedicated. Now you know.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

If you're ordering food from Teppan Bar and Grill you need to hear this

Johnny sees so much malfeasance just walking his dog. Well tonight friends Johnny saw a delivery car pull up outside an apartment building. Instead of grabbing food, the driver for Teppan Bar and Grill walked across the street to an empty lot with a chain link fence and then unzipped his pants and took a good long pee across from where he was delivering food. Then, to Johnny's horror, he went back to the car, picked up the food and then went into the building to deliver it.

NICE huh? Under no circumstances would Johnny name names like this if he wasn't absolutely certain of what he'd seen. It was disgusting on so many couple levels. So fans of delivery, you might want to steer clear of Teppan Bar and Grill for the meantime.

Happy Easter to all our readers

Whether you are more about the religious aspect of Easter or you just enjoy a good chocolate bunny we here wish you all a Happy Easter.

Late night open thread

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Saturday, March 30, 2013

Saturday morning cartoons

Well, one cartoon. Let's learn along about olden times Canada, when people sucked maple syrup out of trees just to stay alive, and the birth of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police with history buffs Peabody and Sherman. Sherman would die if left to his own devices.

Yes, it's Easter weekend, which is also gang initiation weekend

And if we remember about a year ago the New York Auto Show was overrun with wannabe gang members who then ran amok through Times Square assaulting, stabbing, and harassing the general public. Of course this goes back as far as 2006 when over 200 gang losers hit Times Square and stabbed three people. The NYPD says this is their top priority this weekend, protecting the auto show, Times Square and no doubt the subways. 

Of course the intelligence-addled gang members are at least smart enough to know police are looking for them this year so where might this stupidity turn up? Another borough? A specific spot in the city? Here's giving the NYPD a one evening pass on brutality claims that concern gang-related activities.

Is Jersey City on alert? Mayor Healy? Chief Comey? This should not happen in Jersey City. We have the resources, make sure this crap never happens here.

Late night open thread

If we know the speed of light, why hasn't anyone calculated the speed of dark? You think on that...

Time for Jersey City, After Dark


Kicking off the Music Series this week a very blue looking David Bowie with the then aptly named 'Blue Jean'


Nick, Dave and the boys ripping through a long distance dedication tonight from DJ Johnny to an old friend. Rockpile with 'Sweet Little Lisa' from 1980 because that's when it was recorded.


No monkeys were shocked in the making of this video. Physically. Many monkeys were shocked at the lush head of hair Peter Gabriel is sporting here.

Friday, March 29, 2013

Are you a geek, dweeb and or dork like Johnny?

Then you'll want to gather your army and head to 3 West 57th Avenue for the Game of Thrones exhibit sponsored of course by HBO and the imaginations of geeks everywhere. They have clothing, weapons, an interactive archery display and you, yes you, get to take part in the Battle of the Blackwater.

But that's not why you're gonna go. We'll get to that.

It is open from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. on weekdays, 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. on weekends, and 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. on Easter Sunday. Yes, Easter Sunday, when season 3 premieres at 9pm on HBO, what a perfect day to go see this.

So what is going to tip the balance of whether or not you make the trip? You can get your inner Joffrey on and get your picture taken in the iron throne itself. Sit in that chair and remind everyone "The King can do as he likes..."

Late night open thread

Hold onto your ass, it's the 1967 Buick GS 340. But can you afford it? Really, can you afford not to buy this gem? Just listen to Chuck massage that upholstery, that nasty looking upholstery, and make unsettling noises while doing it. Look at that standard GM safety feature, a seat belt buckle. That's right, seat belts were standard and they had buckles. The buckles were attached to straps in that luscious upholstery. Listen to Chuck sit there and rev that engine aimlessly because POWER! Hood scoops set this car off nicely in a Mountain Dew and Doral cigarettes kind of way. Best of all you CAN afford this car, just look at the unreadable sticker, duh. So if you want to drive the same car Chuck drives and meet him when it's inevitably time for service, by all means pick up a 1967 Buick GS 340. With rally stripes.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Governor Christie signs into law "monitors" for Sandy relief money

Governor Christie working once again with Democrats on the topic of Superstorm Sandy has signed a bill into law requiring monitors to oversee rebuilding money lest it be wasted and or um, stolen. Tomas Dinges with the Star-Ledger fills in some of the blanks:

Under the new law, the state will establish a network of monitors to review the procurement process for state contracts using federal reconstruction money, submit regular reports on these contracts and post the information about public expenditures of recovery funds on a public website.


"...monitors will be automatically assigned to any rebuilding project totaling more than $5 million, while anything under that amount will be subject to the discretion of the treasurer, the statement from the governor's office said."

So this is a good thing, and it further harms Christie's standing in his own party by working together with Democrats to help the residents of his state in an effective manner, which is awfully sad. Let's just take notice if there is a sudden burst of $4,999,999 contracts being put through and let's make sure to hire the right monitors, nobody aligned with any political party or party donors please.

Late night open thread

Famous last words edition:

“Love one another.”
 -- George Harrison

TIme for Jersey City, After Dark

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Authorities are conducting emergency rescue drills today at the Meadowlands

New Jersey Task Force One will be conducting emergency rescue drills at the Meadowlands today. Johnny was secretly sent their itinerary:

11:00 -- Locating extra possible emergency car exits
11:30 -- Collapsed structure training
12:30 -- Rescue training for multiple casualties
1:30 -- CPR training for the Jets offense


Late night open thread

New from Ronco, the Popeil Grenade Fisherman!

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

If you're wondering why there have been no posts yet this AM...

You didn't expect Johnny to get up early on his birthday and head into the office did you? Puhleeze. So he's going to do Johnny things (including one massive game of Warcraft later) today and tonight so do feel free to entertain yourselves the best way you see fit.

As always, presents and tributes not necessary (except from JCD staff).

Monday, March 25, 2013

Late night open thread

"I was in a cab in New York. The cab had a sign, "Please do not smoke, Christ is our unseen guest." This guy was reaching. I figure, if he could overcome being nailed to a cross, I don't think a Marlboro Light's gonna faze him that much."

 -- Bil Hicks

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Class, please take your seats we have a lot of material to cover

OK, as Johnny's 8th grade science teacher Mr. S******** used to say "OK students, take out your penso and paypo." This was the same teacher who would put quiz questions on a cassette tape, push play and leave the room for half the hour. After he'd left and the sentry said he was safely in the teacher's lounge we'd flip the cassette tape to the side the answers were on (You know the routine pass your paper to the person in back of you). He'd play those after coming back into class. Sure we kids would make sure everyone got one or two wrong so our good grades all the year long would thus be ensured. Then he'd get awards for having the best students in the world and we all lived happily ever after.

Now the news:

*When Spectra says their pipelines are safe you can't believe a word they say. ALREADY a $70K fine has been dropped on Henkels & McCoy Inc., contractors for unsafe working conditions by OSHA. Henkels & McCoy Inc are also repeat offenders. Don't take the time to make the worksite and thus the pipeline safe, just do it fast right boys?

*Tilda Swinton is tired. If Johnny had any brains he'd go register @Tildaspillow on the Twitter and make comments on the people having their MOMA experience interrupted by a sleeping actress.

*The NYFD has real problems with racists and skinheads in their EMT Division it would seem. The son of their fearless leader jumped ship after some racist tweeting took place. The NY Post caught up with an EMT skinhead-type feller who burst into tears when confronted. How far does this sickness go in the NYFD? A retired EMS vet told the Post:

“He is not an isolated case,” a retired EMS veteran said. “He’s a symptom of a sick system. If you work in the city for police, fire or EMS and tell me you’re surprised by this, you’re a liar.”

*The NYPD has horrifyingly begun running background checks for warrants and what not on women who call and report domestic violence. Shameful right? That'll help clear up the backlog of calls because in many cases there won't BE a call. Way to go you shortsighted turds. Making some women think twice about calling 911 while being abused. That's just ignorant. This had better never ever be the case in Jersey City.

One day a Bushwick hipster walks into a bar with a duck on his head. The next day 10 Bushwick hipsters walk into a bar with ducks on their heads...

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Late night open thread

Johnny never had this particular version of the TV Guide delivered to his house as a kid. He now wishes he had.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Here we go again, 1-3 inches of snow from tonight into Monday

No, the headline pretty much sums it up. More stinking snow and slush and ice and misery on the way into Monday.

Late night open thread

Of all the little factoids CBS throws out in the NCAA basketball tournament, however far they had to dig into obscurity to find them, one surprised Johnny more than any other. This is the first time ever Michigan State and Michigan have been to the Sweet Sixteen in the same year. One would have thought with the success these two have had it would have happened at least once before.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Saturday, March 23, 2013

You've heard of dog shaming? This morning Johnny is New York shaming

Johnny's out walking his dog to the river this morning (she loves the river). Look what he comes across. Two douchenozzles in a Dodge mommy van with New York plates (FSS-2598) emptying as much trash in, on and around a Jersey City provided trash can at Warren and Morgan St. as they could. Just dumping bags and boxes and all the while trying to look around to see if anyone was, you know, watching. Johnny could see what was happening and took out the trusty cell phone camera and it was amazing how fast they closed the back of the mommy van (with some trash still inside) jumped in and tried to zoom off as fast as a Dodge mommy van can't. So here's the mommy van at the scene then trying to make a guilty get-away.

So, why were you doing it guys? Too broke over there in your NY digs to afford trash pick up? Did your boss at the Burger King tell you to lose the trash as your on-site dumpster was full? We'd love to know.

Goooooood morning Jersey City

So, what's on the agenda for today readers? What have we got going on? Johnny's got a date with Emilia Clarke later tonight on the Great White Way but what about YOU Jersey City? What are your perfect Saturday plans? Getting things done or avoiding work?

Late night open thread

"My biggest regret in life is that I didn't hit John Denver in the mouth while I had the chance."
 -- Denis Leary

Time for Jersey City, After Dark


What a gem of a song 'Invisible Sun' is. Making a reggae type of beat sound so menacing and foreboding is truly dazzling. Then when you let Sting fiddle with the lyrics good things are known to happen. The Music Series reminds you to try and not be a statistic on a government chart.


Because sometimes you gotta rock and roll. Van Halen with 'Unchained'


Johnny's got a birthday coming up and it's one of those that makes you take stock of your life and see if you can't actually find that file the school teachers told you would follow you around for the rest of your life. And in looking back at all those really good days, no, goooooood days, darned if they don't all have soundtracks. A song or album can take you to a place and time like THAT. This song is one such 2 and 4 as timepiece. The song is Mick Jagger's 'Just Another Night' from his She's the Boss release back in 1985 which is when our story take place.

Johnny and his best friend went on a roadtrip  that is listed in the history of roadtrips in Chapter 14 'Oh, Canada'. This entire cassette tape (yes it was) was the extended soundtrack but this song in particular brings the memories back. There was insane partying all over the greater Niagara Falls area for a few nights, clubs, beautiful girls, and other things that decorum prohibits mentioning here. It culminated with one of the greatest quotes in Johnny's book of quotes he's kept since 1984. While trying get back to the best friend's relatives home we were staying at a sign on the road we passed said:

Welland 13

So on we drove. And drove, and drove some more. In the distance we saw a helpful sign, it read:

Welland 13

"It sure would be nice if I knew where the fuck I was."

One final confession, Mr. Border Patrol Man in Sarnia Ontario, as our car pulled away Johnny didn't wink at you because he thought you were cute.

Mick Jagger, 'Just Another Night'

Friday, March 22, 2013

Debate night in The Heights

The four candidates for Jersey City mayor squared off last night in The Heights for a two hour back and forth over the issues, and all the character flaws that could be tossed out.

Mayor Healy, Councilman Fulop, Abdul Malik and Jerry Walker all had problems with some of the other candidates platforms. After Steve Fulop said he had a passion for education, Malik responded by saying:

Fulop “has a passion for power, more and more power.”

After Mayor Healy spent time talking about how great the JCPD are and how certain crime metrics are down, Jerry Walker spoke about his plan for real public policing and took the mayor to task for perhaps not seeing the reality of things on the streets:

“We’re tired of looking in the paper, picking up the paper and seeing another kid killed in the streets,” he said. “This has to stop.”

Fulop, as expected, pressed Mayor Healy over what kind of record he has truly built:

“We have an opportunity in Jersey City to be the best mid-size city in the United States of America, and I believe that’s possible,” said Fulop, also noting the city is at a crossroads.

One day after his endorsement from President Obama, Healy continually stressed that streets are safer and hiring more cops would cost taxpayers more, something he's not ready to do:

“Our police department and leadership is doing an excellent job,” Healy said. “What we need are more cops ... that entails money, and we can’t keep hitting the taxpayers over the head.”

So, debate #1 is in the books. Did anyone come off better than you expected? Worse? Anything you'd like to ask the candidates that wasn't brought up? Spill it in comments.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Late night open thread

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

So, any last minute tips you tournament soothsayers can give us common folk?

Get ready 'Murica, here it comes in all its advertising glory, the Greatest Four Days of Sports in Forever. Did you know more menfolk got vasectomies yesterday than any other day of the year? It's true. The recipe for recovery is two days on the couch and WAIT A MINUTE if those two days coincided with the NCAA Tourney then there would be four days to do nothing but watch and buy Chevys.

Good luck to all your teams whomever they may be (except as always Duke) and fairplay to all (except Kansas). Johnny's MSU Spartans have the honor of tipping off the whole mess in less than an hour. In Izzo we trust.

Hockey analyst Mickey Redmond might have the best saying about something like this he uses for NHL playoff overtimes: "This is no place for a nervous person."

So, who ya got?

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Late night open thread

Johnny was just saying he hadn't seen a video of old Stu "The Grim Reaper" Grimson losing his ever-loving mind and trying to fight the entire Toronto Maple Leafs team at once so what say we pop some corn and watch the fun.

Come on down to the War Memorial, we've got fun for the whole family.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

President Barack Obama has endorsed Mayor Healy for another term

You can say this about President Obama, he remembers those who got behind him early in 2007 in his uphill climb for the Democratic nomination against Hillary Clinton. The President endorsed Mayor Healy, one of Obama's first backers when he announced his candidacy, for another term in Jersey City.

Said Mr. Obama:
“To continue moving America forward, we need more leaders like my friend, Jerry Healy. He’s made Jersey City a vital engine for economic growth, innovation and opportunity."

Not a bad endorsement Mayor. Certainly it will sway some voters in Jersey City.

Your thoughts dear readers?

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Late night open thread

What was the 'miracle cure" anyway, cesium?

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Spelunking with Johnny!

Inspired by the guys who climbed to the inside top of the Chrysler Building and reader Sean's link in that same post to the guys who go where they are not invited, deep under the streets of NYC as well as some fine bridge views, Johnny recently did some Jersey City spelunking of his own. There are a lot of unused warehouses about. Many of them long abandoned. Some have taken on a new vibe after Superstorm Sandy. Now for legal purposes Johnny can't tell you where this warehouse walkabout took place, some may frown on this kind of thing, but it took place in Jersey City.

Had to be a cell phone camera sorry, people hanging out around buildings with Nikons looking to get in get noticed.

Monday, March 18, 2013

Late night open thread

Boy howdy did all the weathercasting services and weatherpeople on teevee miss this one today. The old backdoor snow 'storm'.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

One more wintery mess before spring arrives

Now, the weather will be worst north and west of the Jersey City Desk immediate area. That being said we're supposed to get our share of rain, snow and ice over the next 24 hours. The snow could arrive (less than an inch) as early as 2pm while the overnight will bring ice pellets, snow, and a little rain after midnight. If you have to drive home from work tonight or into work in the morning, take caution. Ice is no fun. Remember too, no matter what vehicle you're driving they all are four rubber tires on ice. Don't let your vehicle make you fee invincible.

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Late night open thread

In honor of the NCAA tournament brackets coming out, a quote tonight from famed UCLA had coach John Wooden:

"If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?"

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Who doesn't love a good Irish joke?

Johnny's Irish, he can get away with it...

There was once an Irishman named Murphy who walked into an American Bar. He sat down and asked the Bartender "Give me three shots o' your finest Irish Whiskey!" the Bartender complies.

After about a week of this routine the bartender asks, "Murphy, would it be better for yeh if I put all three shots of Irish Whiskey into one glass?"

Murphy replied, "Well no. See I have two other brothers back at home, Patrick and Owen, and everytime I come into a Pub or Bar I order a shot for each o' them so I can remember the good times."

Well, after another week of this, Murphy comes into the bar and only asks for two shots of Irish Whiskey. The bartender immediately says "Murphy, is everything ok? Did somethin' happen to one of your brothers?" "Oh no", Murphy said, "I just decided to quit drinkin."

It's after the noon whistle, church is out, drinking songs ahoy!

The Boondock Saints favor us now with some Irish Drinking Songs.

An Irish jig over coffee? Why not?

And to that end please enjoy Dick Solberg (A nice Irish name, no?) and the Sun Mountain Band with an Irish jig sure to get you going this morning!

An old Irish lament to kick things off on St. Patrick's Day 2013

Sadly with St. Pat's falling on a Sunday we may not have the rousing party atmosphere we usually do but stick close today as we'll have some real fine Irish songs. As we said, we'll start with this old Irish lament, Molly Ban (pronounced Bawn) with Alison Krauss and The Chieftains.

Late night open thread

We know it's now past midnight which makes it St. Patrick's Day! In case you're still up and having a go with some Guinness or even getting ready to head out for some late night fun, this one is for you.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Saturday, March 16, 2013

If they made crime an Olympic event Anthony Felder would be the Michael Phelps of the Crime Olympiad

Anthony Felder got into a little dust up in a Family Dollar store on Wednesday after putting almost 50 candy bars down his trousers then shoving the store manager on his way out the door. Felder was caught and arrested. We're guessing Felder knew the process as this was the SIXTY FOURTH time he's been arrested. He's been arrested so many times they don't even know the date he first showed up on court radar (most likely when the world was in black and white and dinosaurs roamed the earth). Felder has been arrested for a myriad of offenses including, but not limited to, drug possession to theft and tresspassing charges.

Just imagine his medal haul as he absolutely schools the other competitors from other lands in events like B&E with tools; B&E without tools; retail theft; trespassing with foot chase; trespassing with foot chase over 200 meters; and of course he'd be the favorite in the crime pentathlon.

Look, over the years we've pretty much seen the Olympics are a big racket anyway, so let's mix things people love; police chase videos and sport. Just think of the touching and warm human interest story Bob Costas could do for NBC on Anthony Felder.

Costas: "I want to go back in time with you to a seminal moment in your life. Tell me about your 39th arrest..."

TLC would then give him his own show.

Late night open thread

David Letterman, take it away...

Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear In A Fast Food Restaurant
Friday, May 18, 2012

10. "We're out of meat -- Someone run to the zoo"
9. "No shirt, no shoes: That's the manager"
8. "Anyone seen my glass eye?"
7. "That raccoon's been in the shake machine all day"
6. "Health Inspector -- Run!"
5. "Somewhere on my body I'm wearing an onion ring"
4. "That ain't special sauce"
3. "Clear!"
2. "Will that be all, Lardass?"
1. "My sandwich is giving me the finger"

Time for Jersey City, After Dark


The Artistics hail from the west side of Chicago (Holla Berwyn!) and here they hit us up with some of that fine fine deep dish soul. One of the old Brunswick recording artists. Soul on a roll as we kick off the music series tonight with The Artistics and 'Walking Tall'

Friday, March 15, 2013


Johnny's a big fan of rock and roll history but for the life of him never under stood the big kerfuffle over a song about that god-awful orangey jam.


Labelle in all their glory with 'Lady Marmalade'


You wanna be cool dontcha? Short of starting a debilitating smoking habit to look cool perhaps if you just started listening to Robert Gordon records and playing Robert Gordon music when your friends are over that might do the trick. Well we know it would. It kinda sorta worked for Johnny. Warning though, you start playing the Robert Gordon music too loud and you'll soon have more company and new friends than you know what to do with.

Robert Gordon with 'The Way I Walk'

A very cool map of a very uncool storm

Superstorm Sandy left New Jersey reeling. We've all heard the news accounts and seen the stories of each town rebuilding with a vigor to keep going financially and in part defiance. Moving forward is the course of action the Garden State is all about. There is, however, a very cool map done by NJ Spotlight which is an 'Interactive Map: Assessing Damage from Superstorm Sandy'. It is really quite interesting to see how the damage patterns emerge from town to town and from the water inland. As you might expect Jersey City was one of the hardest hit areas especially business wise. It also gives a final total of damaged homes, businesses and apartments as well as if damage was considered minor, major or severe. Some excellent info in a very complete and helpful map while the clock ticks towards 5 o'clock and the weekend.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Late night open thread

Boy, of all the ways to go being killed to death has gotta be the worst.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Time for another "Thinker AND Doer" Award

Reynold Joseph has good enough taste in cars. Right before being shuttered by GM Pontiac was making great cars, the 2009 Vibe was nominated for Motor Trend's Car of the Year and the G8 was based on the Aussie Holden with the big blindingly fast motor and the car played to great reviews. One of the last 8 cylinder cars around.

Joseph's trouble was selling the car to a woman on Long Island.....then using a scheme to go steal it back so he could sell it again on Craigslist. Like we said, a thinker AND a doer.

Joseph sold the car to the Long Island woman via Craigslist and after she found out she had the wrong title (*cough cough* how did that happen?) he took it out to her address (what a guy!). Later that night she noticed her car was *GASP* stolen! She of course reported it stolen. Wile E.'s plan began to fall apart after he was pulled over in scenic Mahwah because the windows were tinted too dark. The first thing Mahwah Officer David Vega picked up on was Reynold was not allowed to drive in New Jersey or New York, license suspension issues and so forth. tells us the rest:

Joseph claimed that he had just purchased the car after responding to a Craigslist ad, and produced a title to show he was the legal owner.

Vega was suspicious, however, and after running the Vehicle Identification Number through a national database, determined that the car had been reported stolen out of Nassau County, N.Y. Joseph was arrested, and a subsequent search of his vehicle found two "master keys" used to open Acura vehicles and Toyota Camry models.

What? Master keys what? That's crazy. They must have been left by ________________.

After he got the car home police say Joseph planned to re-list the same car on Craigslist and perhaps play a game of "Pontiac presents: lather, rinse, repeat." Joseph wins the Thinker and Doer Award because he might just have hit on phase two of how the South Park Underpants Gnomes can make money. Previously the plan consisted of:

Phase 1) Collect underpants
Phase 2)
Phase 3) Profit!

Joseph solves the riddle here by showing Phase 2 is actually selling the underpants back to the victims. If only he'd have used his considerable business acumen for good. Pity.

The first Jersey City mayoral debate will be March 21

Well the powers that be are calling it a "forum" but trust us, it'll be a debate.

March 21 will find all four mayoral candidates, Mayor Jerramiah Healy, City Councilman Steve Fulop, doctor Abdul Malik and former local basketball star Jerry Walker, on hand to share their ideas on issues facing The Heights and to help familiarize residents there with the mayoral candidates' platforms. Terrence T at the Jersey Journal fills in badly needed details:

The forum is scheduled for Thursday, March 21 from 7 to 9 p.m. at School 28, 167 Hancock Ave. It is being hosted by the Riverview Neighborhood Association, Washington Park Association of Hudson County, Pershing Field Garden Friends and others.

“The goal of this forum is two-fold—for candidates to gain a better understanding of Heights residents’ concerns and for Heights residents to better familiarize themselves with each candidate and his or her platform,” said Becky Hoffman, president of the Riverview Neighborhood Association.

Be there or be square Heights residents. Make 'em sweat. Don't just accept their first answer as gospel and if they try to get off your topic into talking points make sure you jump in and say "Excuse me, but now would you like to answer the question I actually asked?"

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Late night open thread

"Bigfoot is blurry, it's not the photographer's fault."
-- Mitch Hedberg

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Hey kids, do you wanna see something really cool?

How about a trip up into the Chrysler Building? No, not JUST to the observation deck, we mean WAY up inside, to the very tippy top inside the Chrysler Building. Wanna see what it looks like? Follow this link over at Gothamist and see you shall. It sure isn't how Johnny imagined it looking up that high.

Let's check in briefly on the Mets spring training camp

Justin Verlander doesn't pitch for the Mets. This probably gives Mets fans a sad but it's a fact. Verlander pitches for the Detroit Tigers. However yesterday Verlander did pitch against the New York Metropolitans in spring training and oh what a day. Mets second baseman/infielder Jordany Valdespin was in the lineup to face Verlander in a game he'll probably never forget.

Now, Valdespin has a reputation as being a bit of a freewheeler or showoff from time to time. He does things that might just make other players not like you. In fact Mets manger Terry Collins told the NY Post:

Collins has told Valdespin this spring to eliminate some of his antics, warning that he might become a target for pitchers. One such warning came two weeks ago after Valdespin faked a bunt leading off a game against Nationals ace Stephen Strasburg. In the same at-bat, Valdespin singled and received a glare from Strasburg as he ran to first base.

“We’re going to settle some of that stuff down,” Collins said. “[Valdespin] has been told a lot in the last couple of years about how to handle himself on the major league field, especially when you are a young player. He understands it, he’s adjusting to it and once in a while you always get caught up in the moment.

So here was Valdespin facing Verlander, who had already hit a home run leading off the game, in the fifth inning. He took two big swings at the first two pitches then for some reason opened up to bunt. Valdespin’s penchant for flying open early on bunt attempts leaves him vulnerable, said one Mets instructor. And vulnerable he was as Verlander's next pitch, a 94 mph fastball, hit Valdespin right in the family jewels. Square in the nuts. Not a real problem though, after all baseball players wear protective cups.

Not Valdespin.

No, you read that right, Valdespin doesn't wear a cup which is why the Verlander fastball knocked Valdespin right out of the game. Mets skipper Terry Collins was none too amused his second baseman wasn't wearing a cup:

“You would think if you are starting at second base, you would be smart enough to wear a cup.”

No word on if Valdespin, no doubt getting a day off today, was seen in any local sporting goods stores looking for cups.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Late night open thread

Anyone here into numbers? On October 26, 1958 Barcelona defeated Real Madrid by the score of 4-0. On October 14, 1978 Barcelona defeated Las Palmas 4-0. Today Barcelona beat AC Milan 4-0. What do all these 4-0 scores have in common? All the scores came during a papal conclave like is happening now in Rome. Cue the Twilight Zone music.

It should also be pointed out to the Blaugrana's detractors that rumors of Barcelona's death have been greatly exaggerated.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Mayor Healy's speed trap/red light camera is back at Washington and Bay St.

Do be wary drivers of Jersey City, Mayor Healy's plan to balance city spending further out of your paycheck is alive and robbing you in the Powerhouse Arts District this morning. And yes, Mayor Healy does get the blame for this as he was the one who got himself addicted to the cashflow. If any of you Fulop supporters are snickering right now STOP. Your candidate can't seem to take the time to return Johnny's THREE outstanding calls to Mr. Fulop's office about what he'd do about the cameras were he to be elected Mayor. So far Steve can't be bothered to return a constituent's call. If this is how he blows people off before he becomes mayor we might be in for a long four years should he win.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Late night open thread

Know your planets night!

Only two of the NINE planets (Yes Pluto is too a planet Neil deGrasse Tyson) rotate clockwise. If you get both you're named King or Queen of Planet Awareness Week and get in free to the planetarium of your choosing by using Johnny's name as currency. Sure it will, just do it. If you get one you can go to bed thinking you know a little something. If you miss both you are invited to enjoy the NASA page on our Solar System and better luck next time. Buck up, Bunky.

Answer in comments.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

The Jersey City skyline has been used for another television promo

The Investigation Discovery channel is about to drop a new program called 'Dead of Night' (we don't know if it'll be good or stink outloud so this isn't an advert) and in their ad announcing the show to the world we fade in on Jersey City. Then they show Times Square. Get in line NYC. Clearly our fair city is being used to sell ID's programming because Jersey City has zazz.

ID knows what Cool City looks like.

Motown Monday

How about a little Bobby Taylor and the Vancouvers to help make your afternoon an oh so smooth one...

If you'd like a newfound respect for firefighters, here you go

If you have not seen the video of the fire exploding out in Harrison yesterday here you go. YouTuber T00LS was there and has been kind enough to share his/her video across the internet. If you ever wonder how fast something can go wrong for our beloved firefighters, this is a clear example:

We know the JCFD was called in on this fire and we're happy to pass along no humans were hurt.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Late night open thread

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read."
 -- Groucho Marx

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

You know what a pubcrawl is, it's in the FuHo city charter BUT a Dishcrawl is coming to Jersey City

Without pubcrawls the economy of Hoboken would die off. That's great for them. However, Jersey City is holding a Dishcrawl which may intrigue folks with a more culinary interest. Dishcrawl is a San Francisco company that has chosen Jersey City to introduce their super fun evening out. So, how does it work? Let's find out:

Tuesday, April 2nd at 7:00PM a walking food tour of four Jersey City eateries will be held. Tickets must be purchased in advance, so get on that before your other fellow Jersey Citians beat you to it.

Tickets are a mere $45 dollars which includes all your restaurants. There are still a few tickets left. 

So Johnny, what could a San Francisco company know about the Jersey City food scene? A lot apparently:

A short sometimes cramped and bumpy ride on the PATH train, across the Hudson, into the Garden State's second-largest city, boasts New Jersey's best dining scene (sorry, Hoboken).

See there? The BEST Jerry, the BEST!

So which restaurants will you be attending? That's the secret. You'll be informed via email where to meet and where you'll get to go. Cool no? Now if you'd like hints as to where the dinners will be held you can follow @DishcrawlJC on Twitter.

Considerations will of course be made for vegetarian diets. Be there, Aloha!

Late night open thread

Johnny heard some gossip tonight that the Taqueria Downtown is going to open back up any day now. Here's to that gossip being right.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Get your buckets and waders Jersey City, the shellfish are hatching!

Every early early early spring in the Garden State the shellfish hatch from the snowbanks of the season's last big snow. Johnny was out this morning and saw the first shellfish of the season. Gets those buckets and waders and start grabbing with both hands Chester!

Daylight Savings Time starts tonight at 2AM

So set your clocks ahead one hour at 2am and deprive yourself of an hour sleep because FARMERS!

Set your clocks ahead two hours if you really want to make a great impression at work Monday.

Late night open thread

The average person has over 1,460 dreams a year. No word on how many involve Mila Kunis.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark


Your Uncle Johnny is a music encyclopedia he is. For many moons people have said that it is Alison Moyet singing backup on this Culture Club hit 'Church of the Poison Mind' but it isn't. The woman with the big voice is Helen Terry. This song is cool and all but it's also so 80's it makes Johnny want to put on leg warmers and drink a Bartles & Jaymes wine cooler.


Whenever Johnny hears a song by Hole or sees Courtney Love on the teevee he always thinks of Mr. Mackey on South Park saying "Drugs are bad mmmmmmkay." But luckily for us Courtney holds it together long enough on this song, 'Violet', to make it good enough to make it into the Music Series.


So, what were you doing in 1963? If you were cool like Elmore James you'd have been cutting this song in Quadrophonic sound, 'Hand in Hand'.

Friday, March 8, 2013

A snowy walk through the Powerhouse Arts District

What a pretty snow this morning friends, unless you were driving in it. Just a beautiful Friday morning in our fair city...

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Late night open thread

We'll end today with a Haiku:

Sure is snowing hard
Can't see the World Trade Center
Clean sheets warm blankets

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Jersey City Desk free day

Johnny's caught up with something and the interns, we'll they're still sleeping after carousing all night. We'll see you back here tonight for the late night thread.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Late night open thread

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Jersey City raised the Irish flag over city hall yesterday

The mayor, city council, some interested rubberneckers, parade nominees and of course Grand Marshall John M. Burns Jr. were on hand for the flag raising. Mayor Healy said some nice words.

And nobody got arrested, nobody went to jail and nobody puked. That's Jersey City refinement right there, unlike what you might find say elsewhere in Hudson County.

Our good friends at See Spot Rescued are looking for temporary foster homes

See Spot Rescued said they are looking for foster homes for some of their pooches that have been rescued for a two week period. If you can help and love dogs please email or contact k9dergarten for more information.

Late night open thread

Famous last words edition:

"Here am I, dying of a hundred good symptoms."
 -- Writer Alexander Pope, 1744

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Johnny smells a news roundup coming on

Lots to talk about but sadly today Johnny has little time to be in the offices.

*A storm that could cause some substantial coastal flooding will begin tonight and last into Thursday. This storm has the potential to drop 3-6" locally. Despite how The Weather Channel is being absolutely arrogant in naming storms unnecessarily, which has the potential to confuse people, the NOAA NOR  THE NWS DO NOT NAME WINTER STORMS. Winter storms DO NOT have names. Go screw yourself Weather Channel.

*A woman stole a cop car in Camden and drove it across the Ben Franklin Bridge into Philadelphia. When the guy she was with was being arrested, she then stole a Philadelphia PD car and took off. Click the link to watch the race through the streets of Philly.

* A group calling itself National Organization for Marriage has just used Tyler Clementi's suicide to try and push their narrow and unAmerican agenda. Nothing like invoking a dead person you never knew or met to try and score points.

*British scientists have reported out that the cause of the Hindenburg explosion was static electricity.

*The charges he hired a prostitute who spoke on camera against New Jersey Senator Bob Menendez appear to have been made up. Right wing blog Daily Caller, we're looking at you. Tucker Carlson is a little bitch isn't he?

*Finally today, yes, your commute DOES suck New Jersey.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Late night open thread

Is your magic white already on your canvas? Good, a 21 brush salute tonight to Bob Ross. Email us pictures of your completed meadows at home.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

A morning in Jersey City

Johnny was out and about in many places this morning, here is a sampling of his journey...

Sunday, March 3, 2013

Late night open thread

Johnny had forgotten that officers Reed and Malloy on Adam-12 fought crime not in Los Angeles but on the planet Mars. Either that or these colors in this clip put the 'ask' in 'askew.'

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

The Mayor of Manhattan gets roundly (and rightly) booed in the Rockaways St. Patrick's parade

Mayor Michael Bloomberg, who long ago gave up even pretending he represents the parts of the city not named Manhattan was roundly booed at the Rockaways St. Patrick's parade yesterday. Bloomberg tried to mitigate the cascade of boos aimed directly at him by hiding in and among the sanitation workers who were front and center trying to help the locals. That's just cowardly. THOSE guys were heroes to these folks Mayor Mike. You get right out front of the parade and every St. Patrick's parade hereafter, you get out front with your police detail and see what the people really think of your third term.

Know what was even more embarrassing for his highness? Mayor wannabe Countess Chocula (Christine Quinn) dropping back way away from Mayor Michael Bloomberg after the boos started. Of course she said that was the plan all along said spokesvampire Eric Northman.

The best part of this? The comments at the New York Daily News:

He's leaving office why does he even bother to leave the borders of Manhattan and show up in any of the other boroughs?

Our boos were for Quinn too!

ALFONSEC7 hours ago
michael will not be happy with this booing----he may unleash the police to crack some heads in rockaway to show who is boss

Plenty more, follow the link!

Late night open thread

Well we do get email here at the Jersey City Desk and tonight Johnny would like to take some time out and answer a question for a reader.

Dear Frustrated, Johnny thinks the formula you're looking for to calculate the N-th digit of Pi is: Pi = SUMk=0 to infinity 16-k [ 4/(8k+1) - 2/(8k+4) - 1/(8k+5) - 1/(8k+6) ].

Hope that helps.

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Awesome play-by-play of all the arrests, assaults and mayhem in Hoboken is just a click away

Hoboken411 has one great running tab of all the mayhem going on at Leprecon, or as they refer to it at one point "Leprecon Sandy." All-night entertainment awaits. Click here.

Wanna be a prison guard? Rikers Island is having impromptu tryouts

We don't know Yonkers resident Matthew Matagrano but we're going to say he had some time on his hands. Devil makes work for idle hands and all. So rather than go commit a crime on the general public, the registered sex offender acquired a badge and an ID and broke back IN to Rikers and just "roamed the jail," like you do.

For a week.

That's a pretty well run joint eh?

Matagrano will be brought up on charges of impersonating a Department of Correction investigator. No word yet on a trial date for Matagrano who has been previously caught posing as a Board of Education worker to enter schools. If things work out at sentencing and with any luck he can play the Lon Chaney role in the Rikers Island Thespian Club's production of Man of a Thousand Faces.

Load up the station wagon, it's Leprecon in Hoboken today

Yes nothing beats a drunken orgy aka parade in FuHo like Leprecon, a chance to walk up and down the sidewalks from one overstuffed bar to another while police look for reasons to write big expensive tickets. We'll be monitoring this from the Listening Station of Doom and hopefully have those "Man Wets Pants Standing in Line, Gets $400 Ticket" stories you know and read anyway.

So get out to Hoboken today and tonight from wherever, if you're in eastern Pennsylvania and want a fun boozy day just point that station wagon east and follow the sound of hipsters barking at the ants.

Late night open thread

A race track is a place where windows clean people.
 -- Danny Thomas

Time for Jersey City, After Dark

Friday, March 1, 2013


Let's get things moving tonight with Detroit's own Romantics. 4 guys who decided they's had enough of working the production line and bought all the red leather in Royal Oak and started making fantastic songs. The Romantics with 'She's Got Everything'


"Oh no my brother, you got to buy your own." Wise words indeed. A loaned album is a gone album. The smooth romantic stylings of The Chi-Lites and the timeless 'Have You Seen Her?'


Lucinda Williams closing up shop on another Music Series with 'Passionate Kisses', a song Lucinda wrote and Mary Chapin Carpenter made some Billboard bank with.

If you wanna know what's REALLY happening in NYC, who would you ask?

Well of course you'd ask a cab driver. These guys and gals have their fingers SO on the pulse of the city. Reddit interviewed a cab driver who told some pretty amazing stories of the big city. One story you won't want to miss is what kind of customer makes him intentionally TRY to hit potholes.

Click the link to Gothamist and read what is a very interesting interview.