Will you look at that -- Only two days until the world ends

And Johnny and the staff couldn't be more relaxed about this pending doom. They figure they'll just hang out at the Jersey City Desk offices on Friday with friends just in case (We'd of course have to put up a post about how exactly the world is ending so literally a handful of people could read it before we're gone daddy gone). We'll lay in the beer and the sammiches and see what happens.

What about you good readers, do you have plans for your coming end? Going to the bar? To church? To see The Hobbit? Flicking pennies off the Empire State Building? Share your end of days plans with us in comments.

Time to get your affairs in order Jersey City, the rapture is upon us

According to some local religious 'leaders' the end of the world is only 10 days away. You may have seen the billboards or read about this event but we know you have a lot on your minds and wanted to remind you of this brilliant 5 point plan to get the most out of your last remaining time on this pale blue dot we call Earth:

1) Mortgage payments are for suckers at this point
2) Booze it up, God will understand
3) Know that guy/girl you've always wanted to ask out (even if you're married)? What's holding you back NOW citizen?
4) Donuts for breakfast lunch and dinner
5) Give Johnny all your worldly possessions you'll no longer be wanting or needing in the afterlife. His email is listed on this site

Get your affairs in order mortals -- The world ends on May 21, 2011

Or so says one Edwin Ramos of Bridgeton. He is SO CERTAIN that some kind of religious mumbo jumbo will happen (You know, God descends from heaven with angels blowing horns and he decides who is good and bad and he awards the Stanley Cup for eternity to the Red Wings then the human purge is on) and that the world WILL begin to end on May 21, 2011.

Ramos has taken out three billboards claiming the Bible GUARANTEES that May 21, 2011 is the ziggy for mankind. Ramos apparently didn't care for John Cusack's acting as he has crossed out 2012 (You remember the Mayan calendar claims 2012 as the end of the world and Cusack starred in a movie about it) on his billboards and set the date to May 21st, 2011.

Now some, like Johnny, would simply call this crazy religious silliness. However, we think that silliness can best be defined by Ramos' own words:

Ramos added that there is a five-month judgment period after May 21, during which the world will slowly be destroyed, and after which God will form a new heaven and earth, placing the earth’s last day at Oct. 21, when he thinks it will be completely obliterated. What is he planning if he wakes up on Oct. 22?

“If the Bible declares it, which is God declaring it, then there are no more questions. It is not even something that I factor in. I believe the world will end on that day.”

Uh huh, OK then, big party at Johnny's next October 22nd because Johnny's calendar says October 22 WILL happen.

This needed adding: