Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Time to get your affairs in order Jersey City, the rapture is upon us

According to some local religious 'leaders' the end of the world is only 10 days away. You may have seen the billboards or read about this event but we know you have a lot on your minds and wanted to remind you of this brilliant 5 point plan to get the most out of your last remaining time on this pale blue dot we call Earth:

1) Mortgage payments are for suckers at this point
2) Booze it up, God will understand
3) Know that guy/girl you've always wanted to ask out (even if you're married)? What's holding you back NOW citizen?
4) Donuts for breakfast lunch and dinner
5) Give Johnny all your worldly possessions you'll no longer be wanting or needing in the afterlife. His email is listed on this site

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