The giant Space Cat head with laser eyes that has menaced the Hudson and Essex County areas (oddly since Johnny moved here from Michigan) struck again late last night, around 11pm, suddenly rising up off the western bank of the Hudson River attacking several employees of Goldman Sachs heading to Exchange Place.
"We were just dumbfounded at first seeing a giant cat head floating around, I mean who wouldn't be? Then it started shooting at us with it's laser eyes and I just ran" said Julie Evans. "I moved here to get away from sudden unannounced attacks and now this" said Parminder Salim.
Jersey City police would only say several areas along the riverwalk were scorched and a couple benches destroyed. They would not say for certain if it was even a giant cat head with laser eyes; police spokeswoman Kelly Myers said "Who knows, maybe it was a runaway Toyota that took out those benches, we just aren't releasing anymore information at this time".
Witnesses said the cat head then darted towards the New York City side of the river.